How To Defeat Procrastination part 3

 Effective Ways to Defeat Procrastination

This is the final post in this series on procrastination. I plan on addressing this subject more later in the year and possibly get a little bit more specific on more ways to eliminate procrastination from your life, but until then, here are some ideas to work on.

1. Recognize the problem, identify the cause and take appropriate action to defeat it

One of the most important things that you should do to defeat procrastination and be more productive in work and life is to recognize the problem and understand what causes it.

More often than not, we face the problem with procrastination when we are not using our time wisely and spend time working on unimportant tasks instead finishing high priority tasks. Putting off high priority tasks that should take center stage, is an easy distraction that shuts down our productivity. Even jumping of social media can keep you from doing things that need to be done.

Here are some things that will help you identify if you are procrastinating.

· You are procrastinating when you are working with low priority tasks instead of high priority tasks that need to be done.

· You are procrastinating when you are skipping around on your to-do list to do all of the low priority tasks as opposed to following a logical order.

· You are procrastinating when you spend hours on social media and it isn't marketing related..

· You are procrastinating when you are starting to work on a high priority task and then suddenly switch gears by taking multiple breaks.

· You are procrastinating when you leave a task unfinished in your to do list for a long period of time, even though you are fully aware that it is very important that you finish it on time.

· You are procrastinating when you are waiting for the "right time" or the right mood to deal with an important task that you are working on.

· You are procrastinating when you are making an excuse not to do what you are supposed to do.

Once you notice that you’re procrastinating, take an appropriate approach to overcome it. One of the best ways to do this is by prioritizing the tasks according to their importance.

Make a schedule of what needs to be done. Create a checklist or to-do list of all your tasks during the day and arrange them according to how important they are. Try to set priorities in all of your daily tasks. You need to prioritize all of your tasks by putting the most important tasks on top and the less important tasks at the bottom so you will be in the right direction and can cross them off as you go down the list.

Set tasks by category such as high priority tasks for important ones and low priority tasks for unimportant ones. Complete those tasks that are in your top priorities first and when done then you can move on to those tasks that are in your low priority. Do one task at a time. There is no such thing as multitasking.  If you get the chance, go back and read some of my past blog posts on time management.

Act now and just do it

When you already have a to do list or a checklist for your daily tasks, start working on the task by focusing on starting it instead of finishing it. Although you may get depressed because of the difficulty of the task and get pressured because of the deadline, do not allow that feeling to control you. If you do so, this will only create fear as well as resistance towards your task that will affect your performance and in turn this will have a negative impact on how you will do your work.

Rather than stressing yourself out or depressing yourself over the difficulty of the task, just focus your attention and effort in starting the task. No matter how hard it is, just do it. Having a to-do list and starting one task at a time are the best ways to defeat procrastination.

Divide the project into smaller tasks

The size of a task is more than enough to frustrate and depress people, which in turn can lead them to have a lack of interest or desire to work on it to completion. However, instead of dwelling on how big the task is, make an effort to break the project into smaller manageable tasks. In this way, you will be able to easily build an action plan to deal with the task more effectively.

More often than not, people procrastinate on big tasks because they do not know what to do next when they start working on it. This keeps them from continuing the work and finishing it. So, to prevent this, take some time to evaluate the task. Break it down into smaller tasks.

Once you have a plan, start working on smaller tasks that are easier and faster to finish. Doing so will greatly help you to have a sense of achievement and motivation each time you accomplish a specific task. And this leads you to work further on the task.

I also use this technique with goal setting and it works well.

Beat your fear and love what you do

Having a lack of desire for something will greatly prevent you from working at your best. This will lead you to procrastinate. In order for you to work effectively and productively, you should love what you do. See the tasks not as a problem you need to solve, but rather as achievement you need to work on.

Don’t be afraid that you will make mistakes in completing the task at hand. Accept the fact that you will make mistakes once in a while and eliminate any fear that you feel. This will help you to be more productive. 

To overcome procrastination, the first and most important thing that you should do now is to decide whether you want a better life for yourself or let it be this way – allowing procrastination to take over your life and affecting everything you do. If you want to get rid of procrastination in your life and experience a better life from this day forward, act now. Procrastination can't thrive if we act now and on the things that matter.

This will surely help you to overcome procrastination.

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How To Defeat Procrastination part 2

Underlying Causes Of Procrastination

Going back to the definition of procrastination that I gave in the previous post, "putting off things needing to be done in a specific period of time or avoiding things resulting to delayed accomplishments of tasks"... Now the question is what leads

procrastinators to avoid doing something they are supposed to do? The answer boils down to two things that I touched on in the last post and that is fear and desire.

Fear and desire are the 2 main factors involved in both action and inaction. Desire can be best explained as the source of motivation to move forward. Without desire, people do not have the driving force to take action. On the other hand, fear is like the darkness that prevents you from moving forward.

More often than not, if fear is more dominant than desire, procrastination occurs. But if desire is more dominant than fear, action happens.

If people suffer from fear and along with it they lack desire in doing something, the end result is that procrastination is going to happen and, time after time, will eventually take over their life – affecting everything they do throughout the day.

Lack of desire

One of the most powerful factors that cause procrastination is lack of desire. More often than not, procrastination happens to people because they lack desire in what they do. People are more likely to procrastinate if they don't love what they are doing or they are less interested in doing that particular action over something else.

One of the biggest things that I dislike is calling and emailing people, especially when it is to discuss money, so I, in the past, would wait until the last minute to do it. This led to me getting paid later than I wanted, which led to me not having enough funds to pay suppliers, etc. I didn't do this, or not do this as the case may be, out of fear, but I didn't like it, so I ended up filling my time with other things that I enjoyed doing more, such as writing blog posts.

Fear

Another factor that causes procrastination is fear. Even though you have the desire to do what you are supposed to do, if fear is stronger than that desire, it is more likely that you will procrastinate. This can be any fear. It may be a fear that has something to do with uncertainty, pain, hardship, failure, rejection, disappointment or any other similar thing or it could be due to a deep seeded phobia such as not cleaning the attic out of fear there might be spiders.

Perfectionist use procrastination as a resulting behavior because they fear doing something that will be less than perfect than what they envisioned. This, in turn, affects how they will perform in order to complete the task. Nevertheless, this leads them to procrastinate.

No matter how much you procrastinate, be aware that procrastination could turn into a big problem sooner or later and before you even realize it, it is already affecting your life negatively, whether it is your procrastination or someone else's.

So, with this, here are some main reasons why you should act immediately and defeat procrastination all at once.

Reasons Why Procrastination Must be Stopped

If you will not act now to stop procrastinating, it will lead to suffering a number of big problems not only in your work, but more importantly, in your life.

· Procrastination can lead to low quality of life.

· Procrastination can lead to trouble at work.

· Procrastination can lead to less productivity at home, work and life in general.

· Procrastination can lead to frustration and depression due to the things that you didn’t accomplished.

· Procrastination can lead to failure, especially when it comes to achieving your personal goals.

· Procrastination can lead to missed opportunities in work and in life. <---big one

· Procrastination can lead to serious disappointment once you failed to satisfy your own expectations and others’ expectations as well.

There are more, but these are the things that you are likely to experience when you don't get rid of this anchor in your life.

Although this may seem depressing, don't worry because it's absolutely possible for you to change old habits. As long as you will start now, you can stop it from affecting and controlling your life, you can overcome it.

The first thing that needs to happen is to declare that you are not going to let procrastination control you and this sets us up for the next post. See you then, and until next time, here's to your success.

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How To Defeat Procrastination part 1

 

I know that I have covered this in previous posts, but procrastination is one of the biggest problems that keep us from moving forward in business and in life.

Procrastination is a typical problem that a lot of people experience. In fact, this is one of the lead reasons that I never accomplished anything of value for years. Procrastination through fear, through laziness, though boredom; the reasons for procrastination is vast and we all have our excuses for why we procrastinate.

Learning how to defeat procrastination as well as laziness can serve as a big help for you to increase your effectiveness and improve your productivity in both work and life.

Procrastination is a psychological behavior that is associated with those individuals who develop and acquire a bad habit of delaying tasks. More often than not, we’ve been through a point where we have experienced delaying things needing to be done on time. Everyone had been affected by the habit known as procrastination up to some extent.

However, for some, this undesirable problem has become a part of their daily life, which turns out to be their source of continuous anxiety and stress and this has greatly affected their performance and progress in work and life.

As a result, they miss a lot of opportunities, wasted a lot of work hours, experienced resentment, stress and guilt for not finishing what they are supposed to do. Sad, but true this can happen to anyone once they allow procrastination to take over their life, instead of the other way around.

The truth is most procrastinators know what they need to do. However, for certain reasons, they keep repeating this bad habit which prevents them from finishing the job that they need to do. Before, you can know how to defeat procrastination, it is very important that you know the characteristics and common causes of this problem.

Understand them as they are imperative in overcoming procrastination.

Characteristics Of A Procrastinator

More often than not, procrastinators possess a positive view of their ability to finish the work on time. This line of thinking results in a detrimental delusion in time management and creates unexpected delay in their task until there is no time left to finish the work at hand. In turn, this act is followed by a burst of anxious, last minute efforts to complete the work that often gets accompanied by an innate excuse to justify their action, blaming it on “lack of time” or, should it meet a deadline and work, you might hear “I like to work under pressure."

The common characteristics that procrastinators have are:

· Unorganized

· Stubborn behavior

· Manipulatory

· Low self esteem and self confidence

· Inability to cope with pressure

· Fear of failure

· Fear of change

· Fear to face the unknown

· Stressed, tired and overworked

· Perfectionism - A very common one used by entrepreneurs

· Indecisiveness

· A feeling of being too busy all of the time

 

Even though this problem might not seem to be that serious, this can cause disturbing effects to the life of an individual. Procrastinators often experience the feeling of helplessness and weakness together with the frustration of not having the ability to control their life. Or, on the adverse, they take on a cocky attitude, nothing is ever their fault, others can just deal with it, it's part of their personality, so get over it, etc.

I was one that fell into the procrastination excuse of "paralysis through analysis" and very seldom pulled the trigger on anything out of fear I would not do it right. Then, if it was something that needed to be done, then I would rush through it at the last minute and it would become a self fulfilling prophecy because I would end up messing up or not completely something properly.

In the next few posts, I hope to show you that procrastination isn't just a personality trait and can be changed.

I usually end with "here's to your success" but I think now I will say, "work on your success" especially if you are having issues in the area of procrastination.

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Your Balanced Life- Part 3

Keeping the Home Fire Burning

“Work is the meat of life, pleasure the dessert” ~ Bertie Charles Forbes ~

 

We’ve talked about the work environment and some of the considerations there. Now, it’s time to open the Pandora’s Box and talk about your family situation.

Unless you are starting your career fresh, with no history, you probably have a lot of fence mending to do.

Your family and friends may be very discouraged and disappointed that you haven’t found a way to balance your life and spend more time with them.

If this is the case, you need to talk to your family and your friends and tell them what you have in mind. Tell them that you are going to dedicate yourself to achieving balance in your life and ask them for their opinion.

Remember, that you don’t have to take every suggestion anyone gives you, and make clear that you will do what you feel is best in the end, but you want his or her thoughts on the topic.

Listen carefully and be honest with yourself and with your friends and family about what you can expect to achieve.

Don’t promise what you can’t deliver.

If there are going to be issues on which you must compromise, if you will have to look for another job where you will make less money in order to achieve your goals, be sure they understand that sacrifice, as well.

There should be no surprises. Before you start this discussion, put some thoughts of your own on paper and think through what you can achieve, realistically.

Be prepared to talk to your family and friends and have some idea of how you will execute your plan.

You can change this plan and work with your family to adjust it, but you need to go in with SOME plan or you will face a chaotic mix of accusation, opinion and emotion.

Here are some links to get you started. After you look at these links, you may have other questions and ideas. Keep track of these.

Write them down so that you can address all the issues with your boss and your family.

(note: I actually included clickable links in the last post and some jumped off before finishing reading and had trouble getting back on, so I am not including clickables in this post and suggest that you cut and paste into your browser after you have finished reading this post)

The Center for Work and the Family

http://www.centerforworkandfamily.com/

National Institute of Health

http://wflc.od.nih.gov/

Questia Online Library for Work and Family

http://www.questia.com/library/sociology-and-anthropology/relationships-and-the-family/family/work-and-family.jsp?CRID=work_and_family&OFFID=se1&KEY=work_family&LID=14582939

PBS

http://www.pbs.org/workfamily/

Bella Online

http://www.bellaonline.com/site/workandfamily

If you do your homework online, you’ll find many more links that are useful.

There are sites that specifically target stress at work and many other topic-specific sites to help you deal with your job and your family in a way that makes life easier for the ones you love.

When you come up with some ideas to discuss with your family, be sure you preface your discussion by explaining that you want to change your focus and balance.

Tell them that you know that work has been pulling you away and you want to fix that.

Just knowing that you recognize the problem and want to work on it, will make them feel better.

If you have children, talk to your spouse or significant other before you call a family meeting.

Consider how you want to address this with the kids and remember that children will often take what you say very literally so don’t play fast and loose with your language.

Think carefully about what you want to say and the words you will use and only promise them what you can deliver.

Don’t lead them to think you are quitting your job to stay home with them and play all day – unless you’ve just won the lottery, of course!

It is likely that whatever plan you have to regain some balance in your life will take awhile to execute, so don’t promise that everything will be fixed by tomorrow.

You may have to look for, find and train in a new job.

You may have to cut back on expensive purchases and lifestyle.

Be sure everyone is on board before you pull away from the dock! Make sure the children understand how important this to them and to you and what they will get in return.

You may think that is clear, but depending upon their age, it may not be as clear to them as it is to you and your spouse.

As you make your plans for work/life balance, consider these things:

You may be trading long hours for financial stress, if you are going to take a job for less pay. How will that impact the family and your commitment to this process? Can you find ways to offset some of the impact of this financial decision?

If you are not changing jobs, but you are going to manage your schedule in a different way, how will you change your family schedule to accommodate that?

Can you eat dinner a bit later, so you can eat together as a family?

Can you take the children to an early movie to spend time with them before you take that afternoon shift?

If you and your spouse work different shifts to be home with the children, include time in your plan for the two of you to get together. If you have to make a date to do that, don’t be shy about it.

Can you share a cup of coffee in between shifts? Get up a little earlier? Go to bed a little later? Don’t neglect that most important person in your life.

Whatever your schedule is, find some quiet time for yourself, and quiet time with your family without the TV playing in the background. Eat dinner together or play a game. When you go grocery shopping with the children, take a break and go to the back of the store for a cup of coffee and a doughnut. The kids will appreciate the time with you and it will make the shopping more tolerable. Find time to do something as a family at least once a week. Order a pizza so you don’t have to cook and spend the time playing a board game, or taking a hike. 

Pick an activity that everyone likes and just do it! It sounds corny, but even a few minutes of this kind of activity will give you a lot more balance in your life.

Assuming you have done what you need to do to find more time away from work, or to change jobs, you may think you’ve now completed the transition. But, that is far from the truth.

The fact is that balancing work and family – in short balancing your life – can be a constant challenge.

There are lots of distractions and, that extra time you’ve carved out of your work schedule will not do your friends and family much good if you spend it parked in front of the TV or computer, instead of with the ones you love.

To complete your plan, you’ll need to develop two traits: Self-discipline and awareness.

Most of us suffer from the absence of both of these traits, but if you focus on them and on breaking bad habits that distract you and take you away from what you really want to do, you will be much happier.

First, let’s talk about self-discipline. The absence of this trait is what gets you off track. It is what pulls you to the computer casino game instead of out to the back yard to play a game of catch with your son.

It is what makes you put off those chores and tasks – whether they are home or work related – that then spring full-grown at 8:00 p.m. to remind you that you must complete them before morning.

And you spend another evening in the den or office crunching numbers for bills, or finishing that project you put off, instead of tucking your daughter into bed or visiting with your husband over a glass of wine.

When you catch yourself listening to the news anchor while your wife tries, in vain, to tell you about her day, reach for the remote and turn off the TV.

Self-discipline and breaking old habits go hand in hand. If you’ve gotten used to becoming a vegetable when you get home from work, it won’t matter how much extra time you get with your family.

You will simply fritter it away!

Awareness is also important. Become aware of what you are doing, what you are saying and every time you catch yourself taking things for granted, remember that the little time you have with your family and friends is important and pay attention.

Listen to what your friend, spouse or child is saying to you.

Listen to your father when he calls you on the phone and wants to tell you about the fish he caught. And look for the opportunities to grab a special moment during the chaos of your week. Don’t just slide through life.

Make it happen!

There are two other things you may want to consider in your quest for balance at home. These two things will give you more balance and engender better relationships.

And once you’ve laid the groundwork, they will pretty much manage themselves.

The first consideration is: Rules!

Perhaps you are thinking that you hate rules. Most people do, but they are a necessary evil in life.

Think about it! Laws are nothing more than societal rules that keep the wheels greased and running and prevent chaos.

Rules in your work/life balance will give you and your family structure and, if and when the rules are bent or broken, the exceptions must be carefully explained.

Your family and you must know that you mean business and, only when there are extenuating circumstances, are the rules bent or broken.

But, Rules are never ignored!

Rules apply to when and how the family will get together and to things like whether your child can stay out late on a school night or whether they are expected to attend a family birthday party.

They also apply to YOU as they relate to when you’ll come home from work and whether you will attend the Friday night movie with the family or beg off and say you have to work. How often will you make it to the league soccer game or the lacrosse games?

Rules are for everyone.

A good way to establish these rules is to have the family sit down together and develop the list. Everyone can vote and everyone’s opinion counts. Some rules may be very simple and some may be temporary.

But if you have a set of rules printed or typed on your refrigerator, you and your family will feel more confident in your balance and will know better what to expect in a certain situation.

But, don’t expect the family to obey the rules, if you don’t obey them. You have to keep your end of the bargain too!

The second consideration is: Communication!

To keep your life and the life of your family in balance, you need time and attention. But you also need communication.

Even if your job is demanding, you can balance your life better with your family if you make them part of the equation.

Your job and what you do when you are away from home on business should not be a mystery.

If you have to go out of town, tell the family where you are going, when you will be back and why you are going and use telephone, email and text messaging to keep in touch so they don’t feel like you are on another planet.

If you say you are going to call at a certain time, be sure to do so!

Don’t leave them hanging. Leave silly notes or messages to find while you are away and bring home little gifts.

You don’t have to bring anything expensive – some kids get a kick out of the small ketchup bottles that come with your room service order.

That is easy, and inexpensive and it lets them know you are thinking about them.

If you can have dinner together at night, do so and keep the conversation pleasant. Don’t choose dinnertime to bring up bad grades or that boyfriend you can’t stand.

Your kids will not want to have dinner with you, if you do that.

Make the mealtime conversation pleasant, and keep the distractions out of the dining room. No TV, music or other disruptions.

Family meetings are a great way to keep the lines of communication open and, again, everyone’s opinion counts and everyone gets the floor to say what they need to say.

Keep the meetings constructive and informative and talk about whatever is going on in your lives.

A twenty-minute family meeting will give you a chance to touch base and feel connected and, even if you are working long hours, you will not feel like a stranger in your own home.

Agree on how and when you will communicate throughout the day – even when you are not home. Is your child expected to call you and check in when he gets home from football practice?

Create a mail slot or an ‘in box’ for all the notices from school, permission slips and other items. A mailbox for each person in the family is even better, if you have the room.

Then, you can leave little notes for each other to keep in touch, or just to say hello, or ‘I love you’.

I hope that this mini series has given you some ideas on how to get more balance, free up some time, and remove some stress from your life.

My goal is to provide you with guides that can help you go from surviving to thriving.

If you could please let me know in the comments box, I was wondering, do you prefer the longer posts or the shorter format that I have been using?

Also, I was toying around with maybe moving to the next step and moving to a podcast or Vlog format, would that be something that you would be interested in? Let me know below and as always, here's to your success.

Balancing Your Life-Part 2

It’s Time to Take Action

“This strange disease of modern life, With its sick hurry, its divided aims”

~ Matthew Arnold ~

 

In the last post, we discussed the reasons work/life balance is important, and you know that others feel as you do, so what do you do about the problem?

 

You may hate what has happened to your life. But, you probably don’t know how to change the landscape. You will be happy to know that you CAN change your life.

 

Whether you make this decision for health reasons, relationship reasons or simply out of the need to get control over your own life, you have more than enough justification and motivation to make the move.

 

However, you need to make a firm commitment to this change. Be realistic about how fast and how far you can go with this plan.

 

But, let’s be clear about something! What we are talking about here is not quitting your job and hoping that someone will donate money to the cause.

 

There is a real difference between achieving balance in your work and family life and the idea that you don’t have to work at all.

 

Work is part of life, and it is healthy and constructive. It pays the bills; it gives us the reward of real accomplishment and feeling of useful participation in the community and in society.

 

What we are talking about here is the rational balance of your work and social life – a balance that is all too rare in today’s society, and one whose absence has caused sky-high healthcare costs and a dramatic increase in stress, psychological and relationship problems.

 

Now that we are clear on the goals and reasons for work/life balance, let’s continue!

If you’ve decided to jump off the merry-go-round and seek some occasional solace with your family and friends, you must have a plan for your escape.

 

First, and foremost, you must set goals! Involve your boss, co-workers, friends and family in the process and keep the lines of communication open, and you’ll end up where you want to be.

 

Sounds easy, doesn’t it?

 

Depending on your age and how long you have run the rat race, you may find it harder than you thought it would be but with perseverance and the right support network, you can succeed.

Are you ready? Good!

Then, without further ado, let’s proceed!

 

‘The Career’ Versus ‘The Job’

“Work expands so as to fill the time available for its completion”

~ C. Northcote Parkinson ~

 

Before you decide to tell your boss that you simply must have more time off to spend with the family, you’ll need to consider a few things.

 

First, most large companies now support balanced life plans – in other words, they recognize the need for their employees to take vacations, take time off to go to the doctor with a sick child, and get home for dinner at a reasonable hour.

 

But, in some companies, that commitment is lip service only. In other words, what the human resource policies say is one thing. The reality is quite something else.

 

In smaller companies, all bets are off!

 

Some companies are so small that they are not subject to government regulations regarding hours but it is important for you to understand that in today’s world, no company in the U.S. can abuse an employee by working them 24 hours a day.

 

Remember, there are labor laws to protect you.

 

The first thing you need to do is to understand your rights. If you live in a country other than the U.S., you will have to look at the labor laws there to determine what you can expect when you go to talk to your boss.

 

Remember, the better prepared you are, the better chance you will have at getting what you need. If your boss does not know the law, you’ll need to be prepared to educate her.

Before you begin to execute your plan to balance your life, you’ll want to think carefully about your job, and your career goals.

 

You’ll find some thought-provoking considerations below.

 

Think carefully about each of these things, and add your own considerations to the list, if you have some that are specific to your own job.

 

If you really want balance and change in your life, you have to plan for it and then carefully execute the plan with dedication and persistence.

 

Here are some things to consider:

• ��
• Are you a member of a union? If so, there are rules regarding your work hours and these must be enforced. You can talk to a union steward to get help with this.
• Do you have a contract that requires you to work certain hours? If you do, you may have to change jobs to get the balance you want in your life.
• If you are in a position that is critical to the company – in other words, no one else can do what you do – then you may out of luck when it comes to getting reduced hours.
• Are you making a ridiculous amount of money in your job? If you are, your hours are probably not negotiable.

 

The company you work for certainly expects you to earn the money they pay you and the generous compensation is meant to reward you for the hours and stress.

Again, you may have to change jobs and, at the same time, change your salary expectation.

 

• Does everyone in your company and/or department work crazy hours? There are some jobs - like technical support in a company with critical data stored on servers, or networks – where you will not have the option to negotiate your departure time on certain days.

 

Perhaps, on other days when things are quiet and slow, you can ask your boss to let you leave early and/or get compensatory time to reward you for the crazy hours you are expected to work during an emergency.

 

Don’t despair if you are a trauma nurse, or you work in the operating room or in other jobs where you have to work really tough shifts.

 

Many hospitals, fire departments and other such companies are now using a 4-day on, 3-day off schedule or other schedules that let these critical workers spend more time with their families.

 

These flexible schedules also allow employees to schedule daytime appointments, and to decompress from the sometimes-stressful experiences and events that occur while they are on the job.

 

If your employer does not participate in these schedules, perhaps you want to take your skills elsewhere.

 

Seasonal jobs may give you the opportunity to negotiate hours, as well. Put your nose to the grindstone during Christmas hours in a retail store, or summer hours in a surf shop, and ask for extra time off to reward your dedication during the off-season.

 

• Look carefully at your position and determine if you have a ‘job’ or a ‘career’. If you are in it for the long haul and hope to continue the climb to upper management, you can expect to work much longer hours and endure a lot more stress.

 

Can you take another job in a lower stress environment, perhaps a company that prides itself on being ‘family friendly’ and still get into management?

If you want to stay in the company you are in, and continue to climb, and if your company is not dedicated to a balanced life for their employees, you may find it very difficult, if not impossible, to balance your life.

 

• If you are in a position to do so, and your company does not recognize the need for and value of a balanced work and family approach, consider going to your human resource department or to your manager and starting a grass roots movement to look at this issue.

 

Of course, management may immediately think you simply want to do less work than they want you to accomplish. To counter this, you’ll need to arm yourself with information.

 

There are all kinds of studies on increased productivity, employee retention and performance that support the decision to create a balanced work and family environment.

Companies like DuPont, Motorola, Hewlett-Packard, Marriott International, Eddie Bauer Inc. and many others have instituted these programs and your employer may look to these leaders to get some ideas.

 

There are resources available online for you and for your company. These resources include seminars for company employees, and documents that teach managers and employees how to better manage time and workload so that the employee can accomplish more work, and produce excellent output – all in less time.

 

Look at sites like these:

http://www.bc.edu/centers/cwf/

http://cwfr.la.psu.edu/research.htm

http://www.familiesandwork.org/

http://www.workfamily.com/

http://hrweb.mit.edu/worklife/index.html

http://www.uml.edu/centers/CFWC/

 

You’ll notice that many of these sites are sponsored by universities and these universities often participate with companies to help them execute a work/life balance strategy.

In exchange, the university gains valuable insight and knowledge that they use to advance their studies.

 

You will also notice that many of these sites have online courses, or self-paced courses to walk management and/or employees through the process of planning for and executing a balanced work/life program.

 

• If the reason you are working really long hours, under tremendous stress is that your boss is a lunatic, then you need to change jobs. Before you do that, you have to honest with yourself.

 

Be sure that you aren’t contributing to the problem and that you have honestly tried to improve your relationship. Be sure that you don’t make things worse by offering to work longer hours or take someone else’s shift because you feel guilty.

 

If your attitude and feelings of obligation about work are contributing to your long hours and burying you work you can never finish, you have to make some changes in your work habits. This may sound easy, but it isn’t necessarily so.

 

Many people function from guilt and take on more than they should because they want their bosses and co-workers to like them or they think they will get a promotion or raise, when they actually aren’t required to do more than perform well in order to be recognized.

 

If you have emotional issues about what is enough, or how to be well liked on the job, you have to address those.

 

Some companies offer job coaches, or life coaches to help you through these obstacles. If not, consider getting a life coach on your own time or go to a counselor and work through your issues.

 

Remember, it is important to do a good job and even, many times, to go the extra mile, but you should never put yourself in a position where you do all the work while other people get paid the same amount or more and get promotions or time off when you do not.

 

If you get to this point in your reading and you have become convinced that you would have to change companies and jobs in order to achieve the balance you desire, don’t be discouraged.

 

While you may think there are no companies out there that stress work/life balance, you would be surprised at the number of companies – small and large – that are embracing this philosophy as a way to attract and retain good employees.

 

Companies as diverse as Chubb, J.C. Penney, PrintingForLess, and RSM McLadrey have programs in place, and report that their employees and managers have enthusiastically embraced the work/life balance.

 

Employees are working together in teams, better than ever before, to ensure that the work flow continues when they are away at attending a daughter or son’s kindergarten graduation or taking advantage of a four day work week to catch up on their golf game.

 

As this trend continues, and more companies are forced to consider this balanced environment to attract and keep valuable employees and skills, your search for the perfect company will become much easier.

 

In the meantime, look around.

 

These companies are much easier to find than they used to be and it is more acceptable today to say that you want this balance – whether you are male or female, young or experienced, or working as an executive or a retail clerk.

 

The last area we need to discuss in the work half of the work/life balance is Time Management.

 

This may not apply to everyone, but it certainly applies to many people.

 

In surveys done across many job categories, including construction, service industries like hotels and restaurants, small business owners and corporate moguls, a large percentage of those surveyed said that they felt they needed to improve their time management skills so that they didn’t need to spend as much time at work.

 

Many wanted to reduce the time they had to spend reworking tasks they had already performed because they had done it wrong the first time.

 

You will find a few simple tips below, to get your time under control.

 

If you do these things, you will find that, even in the most stressful and time-consuming jobs, you can reduce the hours you spend at work, and arrive home in a less stressed, more family-friendly frame of mind!

 

Make a ‘To Do’ List – Then put these items in order, starting with the most critical. If you could only get one thing done today, what would be the most important?

 

Cross the items off the list as you complete them, and don’t be distracted. Stay focused!

Since we all have interruptions, be sure that, if you don’t accomplish the items toward the bottom of you list on that day, you add them to your list the next day so you don’t drop them.

 

Use a daily planner if that makes things easier.

 

Don’t Waste Time – Use your spare minutes well. Take the train to work instead of driving and use that time to read critical reports you may have to review, or read your new equipment training manual on the bus on the way home.

 

If you are going to take a break during the day and there is someone you have to see, stop by their office and grab them to go for coffee, then talk about the issue and resolve it while you are walking out in the sunshine and enjoying your java.

 

You’ll feel like you took a break AND got something accomplished at the same time.

Just Say ‘No’ - If your boss wants you to work late and you have a family engagement, but you could work late the next night or come early in the morning, suggest alternatives and see if those will work.

 

Don’t be so quick to accept the command without probing to find out if there is another way to handle it.

 

If a co-worker asks you to lunch and you MUST finish a report by 3:00, politely decline the invitation and suggest dinner or coffee later instead, and get the report done.

That way you don’t have to give up the pleasurable experience, but you won’t be stressed out and working until 9:00 p.m. with your boss standing over your shoulder bemoaning the delay.

 

If the project your boss dumps on your desk is a ‘rush’ but she already gave you something that must be completed today, ask for clarification on priorities and give your boss a reasonable projection of how long it will take to do both projects and whether you can do both.

 

Don’t just take the project on and then not finish the other task she gave you, or you will both be unhappy. Speak up!

 

Know Your Brain – Do you know what the Circadian Clock is? It’s that little clock in your brain that controls when you feel the most wide awake and when you want to go to sleep.

 

If you are a morning person, attack the most difficult problems in the morning when your brain is the sharpest. That way you won’t have to rework the problem the next day when you discover that the ‘afternoon you’ made the wrong decision about the budget.

Get Enough Sleep – Your brain can operate on a short nap for a day, but if you are not sleeping enough, you will not think well or process information and you’ll make mistakes and end up staying late to fix them.

 

Advertise Your Schedule - If you hate getting phone calls first thing in the morning, before you get your day organized and have your first cup of coffee, then let your calls go to voicemail until you feel ready to take the calls.

 

You will be more focused and get more accomplished, instead of having to say, “I’ll have to get back to you on that” after hearing a ten minute explanation of the latest crisis.

 

Be Your Own Master – Sit down with a pencil and paper or a calendar and figure out how much free time you have.

 

Schedule and plan your activities at work and get your personal and family obligations on the calendar. Treat these personal obligations with the same respect you would treat a business meeting.

 

Don’t cancel personal appointments unless it is a real work emergency and, in the case where you MUST cancel, reschedule immediately and apologize to your friend or family member.

 

Explain what is happening so they don’t think they are unimportant to you. And be sure to keep the appointment you make with them the next time!

 

Don’t Procrastinate or Agonize – Don’t spend time during a family dinner worrying about the presentation tomorrow. Put your mind back where it belongs. Worrying never helped anyone accomplish a goal.

 

If you are prepared for the presentation, just do it. If you aren’t prepared, it is doubtful that you will be prepared by the morning so don’t worry about it.

 

Don’t procrastinate because you don’t like a particular activity.

 

FIRST do those things you dislike the most, and then reward yourself by doing the things you most like to do.

 

Put things on the calendar and stick to the dates – don’t talk yourself into waiting or you will just have more to do tomorrow!

 

Train and Delegate – Don’t tell yourself you don’t have the time to show someone else how to do that job that you REALLY don’t have to do.

 

Take the time to teach them and soon you will have a well-oiled team machine going, with everyone doing what they are capable of doing.

 

Don’t worry that the employee will take your job.

 

If you create a functioning team with everyone performing well, your reputation as a manager, mentor and coach will give you a shot at that promotion you want.

 

And, when you don’t have to do ALL the work yourself, you will find a lot more time to get those other tasks done and still get out of the office, shop or store on time and get home for Mom’s birthday dinner.

 

The other benefit to this time management technique is that, when you go on vacation or take that long-awaited three day weekend to go skiing, you will not have to call the office every hour to be sure there isn’t some problem you have to solve.

 

Your family will greatly appreciate having your attention on a dedicated basis for a few days of much-needed bonding.

 

And don’t overlook job-sharing programs, and cross-training as concepts that will nicely cover responsibilities and ensure that the company keeps running when you are not there.

Get Organized – It is impossible to manage your schedule if you can’t find things or if you have to recreate work or reinvent something because you lost it.

 

Take that Action List to heart and, starting today, put a task at the top of the list to organize files, or to rearrange the store or inventory so it is easier to stock or to find things.

 

Once you have things organized, don’t let them get out of control again.

The only way to justify the work involved in that reorganization is if you KNOW you will never have to go through it again!

 

Keep a Realistic Perspective - Setting unrealistic goals is a mistake – whether it is the completion date of a software project, or the time you think you can deliver that report to your manager, if you underestimate the time required to get the work done, you will end up working late and you’ll look bad to your boss.

 

Be realistic about when you plan to complete tasks and do your homework to be sure that you can accomplish the task in this timeframe.

 

Consider other ways to get the job done if you think these considerations will help you meet the deadline faster, but don’t promise what you can’t deliver.

 

It is good to set goals that challenge you, but if you can never reach the goal, you will not do yourself any favors.

 

We’ll talk about your goals and what you really want in a little while, but for right now, you need to think realistically about your dedication to a balanced life.

 

It will come with some sacrifices in certain areas, but it will reap many benefits in your life – health, relationships and happiness to name a few.

 

Is balancing your work and your family life important enough for you to make some tough choices? If it isn’t, you may not get the balance you want.

 

Decide NOW! Start TODAY!

 

 

Gain a Balanced Life-Part one

 

“The trouble with the rat race is that, even if you win, you're still a rat” ~ Lily Tomlin ~

There was a time, in the not-so-distant past, when families were expected to give up everything in order to achieve the financial security they craved. Perhaps you remember those decades, perhaps you are too young to recall those times.

Those were the days when climbing the corporate ladder was a revered activity, and wives and children gazed fondly at pictures of the breadwinner in order to remember whether poor, exhausted Dad had blue eyes or brown.

Large companies moved employees from one city to another, like pawns on a chessboard and, if you had any hope of climbing the ladder toward upper management positions, you packed up the wife and kids and moved on from Chicago, to Boston, to New York, to Tokyo.

In the intervening years, the divorce rate climbed, fathers lost touch with their families and died of heart attacks and strokes at an alarming rate. When these men retired, they felt useless and unproductive.

Over the years, the identity of these men had become inextricably tied to their success on the job. New retirees found themselves wondering who they were, and why they were living with women who were complete strangers to them. And, whatever happened to those darling kids who used to live in the house?

Then women entered the workforce in earnest and joined in on this wonderful rat race.

Now, you obviously can look around in your own situation and see that this rat race has not come to an end, just look at the amount of stress related death and illness, an increase in the average number of hours worked by employees in the U.S. and around the world, skyrocketing numbers of divorces and children in single-parent families.

And, let's not forget about those who are responsible for the care of aging parents. We live in a world of conveniences that were designed to give us more leisure time. But, it would seem that all the informational overload, whirring computers and media blitz has given us is more time for work.

It is not unusual for men and women to work sixty or seventy hours per week on average. Some of us work eighty or ninety hours without batting an eyelash. And, we fool ourselves into thinking we have a life!

If you are one of the enlightened few, you have already come to the conclusion that giving up a social and family life is too great a price to pay for career success.

Maybe, you have stress related health problems, perhaps you are not eating right, and you are probably fighting with your spouse, boyfriend or best buddy because you spend too little time with the people you care about most.

You probably can’t find the time to return phone calls or send a birthday card to your Aunt Betty.

It doesn’t matter if you are a lineman for a utility company, a pizza delivery girl, a corporate executive or an aspiring dancer.

In today’s chaotic world, it is a safe bet that you don’t have enough time for work, family and friends. And, since your boss holds a tight rein on your paycheck, it is likely that

You Are NOT Alone!

“The be-all and end-all of life should not be to get rich, but to enrich the world” ~ B.C. Forbes ~

Did you know that the Society for Human Resource Management has reported that 76% of American workers are considering looking for another job and, further that they estimate there will be 22 million new jobs created over the next ten years, but only 17 million new workers available to fill these jobs?

While every generation of workers has a different set of work expectations, the desire for work/life balance has become one of the foremost goals of every generation in the workforce today.

Baby Boomers are reducing work hours and many ‘Thirty-Somethings’ are starting their own businesses in order to have more control over their lives and schedules.

A recent study done by the Families and Work Institute illustrates that young workers just starting out in the workforce are choosing to turn down promotional opportunities to achieve greater work/life balance.

Why do you suppose these apple-cheeked, enthusiastic job entrants might take this approach? In a study done with young employees by Families and Workplace, work/life balance was among the top for both genders.

Most of these young adults were raised in families where both parents worked and they experienced the sacrifice and demands placed upon their parents, firsthand.

Not surprisingly, of all the generations in the workforce today, these young adults are the most likely to consider job flexibility and schedules when they look for a job, and it is key to employee retention for companies that employ these young workforce.

The point of all of this background information is to let you know that you are not alone in your desire to find balance.

All generations in all types of jobs are today, looking for balance, less stress, and more time with family and friends. Like you, these people are willing to give it their all when they are at work and they expect to work hard, but in exchange, they want a life.

In essence, YOU ARE NOT ALONE!

If you think that work and family life balance is a small problem, you may be interested to know that, in addition to the few companies that have recognized the issue and taken the lead in establishing life balance programs, there are numerous organizations, foundations, universities and groups doing research on this topic.

Organizations as diverse as religious groups, government agencies, human resource companies and behavioral scientists now study these issues and, not just because it is the right thing to do.

There are real economic advantages to companies that recognize the need for life balance and create a working environment to help their employees live their lives more fully.

Companies spend a lot of money training and keeping employees and happy employees will stay longer, live longer and contribute to the company longer.

But, we are just scratching the surface in understanding the true human toll that an unbalanced life takes. Many have studied the evolving societal issues and their roots in overwork and lost community connections.

If you WANT more balance in your life but you wonder whether it is all that important, let’s talk about the reasons you NEED this balance.

“We are coming to understand health not as the absence of disease, but rather as the process by which individuals maintain their sense of coherence (i.e. sense that life is comprehensible, manageable, and meaningful) and ability to function in the face of changes in themselves and their relationships with their environment” ~ Aaron Antonovsky ~

Health – Living an unbalanced life where work dominates can significantly affect your health. Long or stressful work hours can cause problems with your heart, your blood pressure, and your sleep cycles.

Studies show a significant increase in heart attack and stroke since the advent of seventy-hour workweeks. Long hours at work and lots of work related travel also encourages poor diet and leaves little time for exercise.

As we become more out of shape, sleep less and experience health problems, we are no longer the powerful asset to our employers, nor can we participate fully in a family and social life.

Emotional Wellness – Your ability to give back to your family, friends and community, and your own emotional stability depends on a balanced life.

As overly dramatic as it sounds, you are likely to experience emotional problems, need counseling and suffer from anxiety attacks or other problems if you have no time to decompress and relax.

There are numerous scientific studies on the benefits of relaxation, recreation and meditation.

And these benefits are both physical and emotional.

You can’t be ready to take on the issues in your family, support your spouse, parents, siblings and children and your friends if you have no emotional stamina.

If you’ve spent all of your focus and attention on work and you find yourself so tired at the end of the day that you don’t even want to talk to your family, you have a problem. And your family may not wait around for you to resolve it!

The societal impact of ‘all work and no play’ has damaged and destroyed many a family and the divorce rate continues to climb. Children grow up barely knowing their parents because they are away at work all the time.

Family vacations are a thing of the past in many families. Vacations get postponed and many employees find themselves losing their accrued vacation time because they have ‘rolled it over’ for so many years and just NOT taken the vacation they deserved.

Your emotional reserves are depleted. You have no patience with yourself or others. You are short on sleep and even on time to think about what you want for dinner.

Is it any wonder that psychologists and psychiatrists are busier than ever?

Stress - We have talked about the health implications related to ‘all work and no play’ but stress is its own health factor.

Even if you like your job, if you have no time for anything else, stress will get you eventually.

We’ll talk more about stress later and you’ll get some tips on how to eliminate or mitigate stress so that your body and mind will be better able to handle whatever comes your way.

For now, what you need to understand is that stress can affect your physical and emotional health and that, over time, it can make you very sick. If you are not in a position to change jobs or otherwise make a major change to relieve stress, learn how to handle it better.

We’re not talking about taking five years of classes here. We are talking about simple techniques you can use to help balance your life.

Remember that work/life balance is not just a question of the hours you spend in one place or another. It is also a question of how balanced you feel and how you react to things.

No matter how much time you have with your family and friends, you will enjoy it more if you are able to balance YOURSELF.

If you can become less of a victim of stress and overwork and take control of your own reaction to stress, you will live longer and be happier at work and at home.

Family and Community – Government and university studies support the idea that the ‘all work and no play’ lifestyle contributes to divorce, dysfunction in the family, and lack of involvement and investment in the community and neighborhood.

As the community grows apart and neighbors become strangers, emotional and family support for things like childcare, help with aging parents and support following trauma and tragedy become real issues.

The community turns to the government to supply services to fill this gap, taxes rise and people remain strangers.

Families struggle with alternating schedules, and children fail to thrive emotionally and physically.

Divorce is rampant and single parents are under even more stress with even less time to pay attention to children. So, things deteriorate even more! 

Role models for marriage, relationships and juggling time and family are important to a child’s adult relationships. If we do not provide those positive role models, we perpetuate the problem.

It is interesting to note that the generation of children now in the work force has started to rebel against jobs and employers that require ridiculous hours and dedication beyond the call of duty.

They understand the toll this type of career takes on a life. They grew up in families that suffered this impact.

Perhaps our greatest hope for change lies in this generation of seasoned veterans of dysfunctional families.

Productivity – If your employer believes that your eighty-hour workweek is giving him more benefit, he should look at the statistics and information gathered by human resource companies and companies that focus on efficiency and productivity.

It is a fact that the human brain needs downtime and rest and recreation to recycle. Think about your own life and the times when you had to work long hours to get something finished.

Perhaps you found that you could barely focus after a certain number of hours. There is a reason that coaches that teach good study habits tell students not to cram for

eighteen hours before an exam, but rather to spread out the studying and mix in recreation.

Take a walk; talk with friends to regain your clarity and focus.

If you and your employer truly want to take the best advantage of your time, you need to take time for yourself.

You will spend less time reworking things you’ve done wrong, mistakes you’ve made and details you’ve missed. And your employer will get better quality and output regardless of your job.

Pilots are subject to time constraints and can only spend so many hours in the air because airlines learned a long time ago that a tired and overworked pilot could make critical errors.

In lengthy heart surgeries, surgeons take breaks and leave the operating room to clear their heads and rest.

Again, these habits and techniques were learned the hard way and only when critical mistakes were made did these work policies change. You wouldn’t want a tired doctor working on your open heart, would you? 

Life Goals – Everyone has goals. And you are probably no exceptions. You may have work and career-related goals like promotions, expanded responsibilities, and recognition as an expert in your industry.

These are all fine, but be sure you don’t just focus on your job. Many people come to identify their success in life by their position in their job and the recognition they get there.

If they become disabled or sick, or if they retire, they suddenly find that they don’t know themselves anymore.

This post is getting a little lengthy, so I will jump off now, check out the next entry in this series on creating a balanced life and until then, here's to your success.

They have no identity at work so they don’t know who they are. They may have lost family and friends or have become strangers to these people, unaware of the important events that happened at home while they were at work.

So, they have to get to know themselves and their loved ones all over again. For some, this is an impossible task.

Be sure you set personal goals, family goals and general goals in your life for growth and happiness.

Whether it is going on for a Masters Degree in the fine art you love, learning how to fly a plane, or playing the piano, you should have goals that keep you involved in other parts of your life.

While you are setting goals, don’t forget your family goals. Perhaps you have always wanted to take your wife to Hawaii. Set the goal and a timetable and do it!

Remember that life goals can include giving back to the community and to others.

It is interesting to note that, since so many people cannot achieve their personal goals because of career obligations, we now find it difficult to get baseball coaches to volunteer their time, or to get people to volunteer in hospitals and work for the community as a volunteer ambulance driver or firefighter.